Tis the season to be jolly”, as the age-old song reminds us. In that vein, here are some stories to lift your spirits - Happy Holidays!
Old-timer: You know what I've noticed during my time in the program?
Newcomer: What's that?
Old-timer: It seems like 4 out of 3 old-timers struggle with math.
Newcomer: My wife told me I have two major character defects.
Sponsor: Really? What are they?
Newcomer: She says I don't listen and something else.
Patron: My partner says I'm crazy, but I think he's wrong.
Bartender: How come?
Patron: He's the one who married me.
Old-timer #1: I miss the good ole days.
Old-timer #2: Yeah, how come?
Old-timer #1: I wasn't that good and I wasn't that old.
Newcomer: You know, this quarantine has really been a blessing to my program.
Sponsor: Wow, that's a great attitude. How has it helped?
Newcomer: My partner and I are all caught-up on what I've done wrong these past twenty-years.
A Newcomer lamented: "It's like I'm stuck between a rock and wanting to throw it at my sponsor".
Newcomer: This quarantine has been great for my prayer and meditation. I think I've finally figured out what God has been trying to say to me?
Sponsor: What's that?
Newcomer: God's telling me I’m grounded for everything I did before I came into the program.
Newcomer: You know, I've always heard that love is grand.
Sponsor: Yeah, I've heard that too.
Newcomer: Yeah, but they never said that divorce is about 100-grand!
Newcomer: I've read a lot lately in our literature about social media and protecting anonymity online.
Sponsor: Yeah, I've read those articles too.
Newcomer: I think I figured out the golden rule about social media.
Sponsor: Really, what's that?
Newcomer: Tweet others like you would like to be tweeted.
The golden rule is a good rule to practice the year round. May the Higher Power that surpasses all understanding, grant you and yours a joyful holiday season and a bright and prosperous New Year.
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