Last month we discussed a new series of articles focusing on the tools to build recovery capital by addressing some of the common struggles, questions, and successes that can present challenges to our mind, body and soul, even while sober. Building recovery capital means just that, building up enough resources, tools, and community inside the rooms of recovery and during the recovery process to rely on when things are difficult - when life asks us who we are. This “recovery capital” will help guide us through the rough times, to grow and adapt to life’s challenges to eventually come out the other end with new meaning and purpose.  

All of us, or nearly all of us, are sober when we read this essay. For us, getting sober is no longer the issue. Staying sober is. Alcoholism and addiction are chronic illnesses, and relapses are common. Staying clean and sober requires an ongoing participation in recovery. The best recovery is in Twelve Step programs. Meetings are good. Step work is better. Working with other alcoholics to help them get sober is best. A.A.’s “Big Book”says "Nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail.” (p.89) I know that  this is true for me.

The Import of a Word: Some years ago I called the research library of AA International and asked one of the librarians if he knew why Bill W. wrote “turn our will and lives over to the care of God” rather than simply “turn our will and lives over to God” in the third step. He said he would research the question and get back to me soon.

Walking into the rooms of recovery is often the first step to what could become a fundamental change in your life. A change that brings hope, a sense of peace and serenity, and even love. Starting this journey, however, is not just about making a decision to refrain daily from the use of drugs and alcohol. Of course not using drugs or alcohol is required to participate in the rooms of recovery, but the mindset of this change in yourself is something more. It is a decision to show up to do the work that is required to participate in having a meaningful life. Really, it is a conscious choice to invest in yourself by building recovery capital to become the person you were meant to be.

“I DON’T HAVE TO ATTEND EVERY ARGUMENT I’M INVITED TO.”

Alcoholics are naturally argumentative, but Alcoholics Anonymous is a remarkably peaceful program. The reason for this is that Alcoholics Anonymous is built on the experience, strength and hope of its members, rather than resting on doctrine or beliefs. The first draft of the Twelve Steps invited alcoholics to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God. The final draft, which was published in the first printing of the first edition, invited alcoholics to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him.

There has been an important change in the way that many people define relapse and recovery. Twenty years ago, when I started working in treatment, relapse was a sign of failure, a failure with a shared responsibility. It was the alcoholic’s responsibility, in that they had picked up another drink, but it was also a time for the staff to question, “What did we miss? Is there anything we could have done, or done better that could have helped this alcoholic avoid relapse?”